My Life-Changing Decision

MY LIFE CHANGING DECISION ROSS BROWN ENGL 1301-270 SUSAN ROBBINS 4/2/2013 It was the beginning of spring nearly two historic period ago- a wet and gloomy daytime. I was thirty two years old, strung out on meth and homeless. Headed back to prison for the third time, I was faced with a life changing decision, do I turn myself in or do I keep running and take my chances. It was a decision that would affect the ones I love the most, my children. As I sat in the woods behind a run down, drug infested motel, I closed(a) my eyes and all I could see were the tears in my kids eyes e truly time they came to see me in prison.The ones that depended on me for love and security, were now bad and scared of me. They were as lost as I was. Thoughts began to run through my head, have I failed my children as a fuss, do I expect them to go down the same path I went down or do I want to give them a future and a father to be proud of. Living the life style I lived for ten years, taught me not to tr ust people. Especially authority figures. So the thought of turning myself in didnt sound like a good idea to me at the time. It left me puzzled and scared.I could keep running, but the past ten years had been zero point but a continoues cycle that always landed me back in prison and left my children without a father. Ive always been cognize for taking chances. turn myself in would require taking the biggest chance of my life, trusting an authority figure and the system that I thought had already failed me. My Pastor had always told me recovery has to slit somewhere son. At that moment, with my children in mind, I had made my decision. I was going to turn myself in.As I opened my eyes, tears streaming down my face, the day seemed to turn from wet and gloomy, to calm and clear. I picked up my phone and made the call. I was to turn myself in to the authorities within two weeks. On April 20,2011 I walked into the Federal Halfway House. I was tired, physically and mentally. I did no t know what to expect or what was expected of me. They gave me three meals a day and a rocky mat to sleep on. They provided transportation and the opportunity to become stable, if you wanted it. I wanted it bad It would require a lot of effort and determination to declare it through the system successfully.Not many ex felons make it. They looked at me as another statistic when I first arrived. You only have a certain add to keepher of time to get a job and start your recovery. I struggled, nobody wanted to hire a recovering ex con. I was starting to call in I was not going to make it. I was at the end of the dead line, they were wanting go ahead and send me back to prison. On the very last day the phone rang, it was Bill Orr with Gym Bleacher Boards. He asked me to come in right away for an interview. I had to get permission from the job coordinator in order for that to happen.He was not wanting to give me this last chance at getting a job. Then out of nowhere my case worker, Ms . Woodson, showed up and say just give him this one last chance before you send him back. When I arrived at Gym Bleacher Boards, I was nervous and had mixed emotions about everything. As I sat there waiting on my interview with Bill, I said a little prayer to myself, Lord, please let me get this job, not for me, but for my children. Bill came out of his office and called me in and I was up front about everything.By the time the interview was over, we were talking as if we had known each other for years. Then he looked over at me and said, Ross, everybody deserves a second chance at life, you are hired. Within two months I was able to get my own place and out of the Federal Halfway House. Now, two years later I got my family back, a good job, and a portion of nine month old twin daughters. As I look back on the day I made my decision, I realize I took a chance that changed my life. Now, I am able to give my children a future and a father to be proud of.